Yesterday, I went to an inversions workshop with a lot of floating, flipping, jumping... Now, I've always been able to get up with a wall nearby but somehow, being further away, I've always freaked out.
Learning to fall (tucking your chin to your sternum) was a good first step. I tried distancing myself away from the wall, with plenty of cushy mat to fall on, but still, my instinct was not wanting to fall out of forearm stand. I knew I could do it, but a big mental hurdle remained. Brendan, the teacher, simply said, I can't help you. And while infuriating, he was right, that mental block has nothing to do with strength or alignment - all things that are already in my arsenal - this last step of the journey I would have to go at alone.
Then, somewhere near the end of class, we were going through scorpion pose, and I distanced myself a little further from the wall, maybe a little more than an arm's length - not too close, but not too far - and, tired from a long day of yoga, floated up into a forearm stand, and then leaned into a scorpion, wall-free.
And there it was. That moment when it all clicks. When things snap into place quietly and without warning. Without thinking. Sometimes life just surprises you.